Posts Tagged ‘clothes’

Goodbye washing machine, hello Luna

May 14th, 2014 1 Comment By Lucy Sweet

Wouldn’t it be great if you didn’t need to take your dirty skanks out of the washing basket and put them in the washing machine? Wouldn’t it be great if instead, all you had to do is throw a big massive steamy ball into a pile of festering washing and it would get them all clean?

luna 300x194 Goodbye washing machine, hello Luna


A Colombian student has come up with a concept which could see the humble washing machine consigned to the scrap heap.

It’s a rotating, vibrating metal ball (oo-er) called a Luna – an electrostatical washing machine that creates a cloud of steam which is electromagnetically charged to draw dirt and clean the clothes, without needing much water at all.

The muck is attracted through the holes into he middle of the ball, and after that it DRIES any of the damp in the clothes caused by the steam. YOU DON’T EVEN NEED TO HANG THEM UP.

Sigh. I love you Juan Camilo Restrepo Villamizar from the Colombia Universidad Pontificia Bolivariana.

Anyway, his design has been selected as a finalist for the Electrolux Dream Lab contest, so hopefully it’ll be made and we can ditch the washing powder and the hours of waiting for our laundry to dry properly without smelling of wet dogs.

And let’s face it, we all need a big vibrating ball in our lives. Amirite ladies?

British women are all ‘wardrobing’

November 5th, 2013 3 Comments By Mof Gimmers

a typical woman 214x300 British women are all wardrobingAccording to research, one in every six British women has wardrobed. No, this isn’t something kinky, but rather, it is the act of ‘wardrobing’ or, if you prefer, the practice of buying an item of clothing, wearing it with the tag in and then returning it to the shop for a refund.

This has become a regular occurrence for one in eight women, and they’re saying it helps them to save money.

“Our research reveals that over a quarter of women who admit to ‘wardrobing’ feel guilty about it but the pressure to look good on special occasions makes it feel like the only option for some to look good on a budget,” said Anita Naik, consumer editor.

Most people do a bit of wardrobing so they can impress their mates on a night out and it gives them a chance to wear incredibly expensive items and then get a refund on it. However, growing numbers of ladies are wardrobing for weddings and job interviews.

One in ten British women are shopping, looking for clothes that have a safety pin tag, which means the label can be taken off and replaced later, while one in every twenty spray the item with air freshener before taking it back to the shop.

“If you plan ahead, you can take advantage of sales, discounts and deals if you want to buy something new, or buy less expensive items such as accessories to refresh an existing outfit. Even better why not borrow clothes from friends in different social circles for the events you’re attending. As long as you’re willing to repay the favour, you will all benefit from getting the most cost-per-wear out of your special outfits,” Naik added.

bait 300x186 Chessington World of Adventures are asking humans to stop dressing up as animalsAnimal print clothing has been banned at Chessington World of Adventures because owners think it’ll confuse the theme park’s animals. Leopard print coats may be your thing, but to an animal, you just look like bait or something it wants to shag.

Remarkably, the theme park have employed bouncers to enforce the zero-tolerance policy. You have to hope the bouncers in question aren’t too simian-like, or else there’ll be further confusion among our beastly cousins.

In the ban are zebra, giraffe, leopard and African wild dog prints.

Apparently, Chessington’s zookeepers have noticed confusion amongst the animals when they spot humans wearing animal print clothing and this isn’t a PR stunt at all. Guests who wear animal print will be supplied with Chessington clothing… and if they refuse, they’ll be fed to wolves.

Spokeswomen Natalie Dilloway said: “Since the launch of ZUFARI, guests have interacted with the animals more closely than ever before and we have noticed a lot of animals becoming baffled by animal-print-wearing guests. The enclosures at ZUFARI have been designed to replicate the conditions species face in the wild, so it’s no wonder the animals are getting confused when they see what they perceive to be zebras and giraffes driving across the terrain in a 7.5 tonne truck! We kindly ask guests to refrain from wearing animal print at the park.”

Consumers want to pay more for their clothes?

September 16th, 2013 6 Comments By Thewlis

clothes 300x224 Consumers want to pay more for their clothes?When times are hard most of us have been looking at ways to cut costs to keep pace with falling real incomes. Environmentally-motivated costs are often first to go- it’s harder being green when you’re in the red. However, a new survey by You Gov for the See Through Fashion campaign found that 74% of people would willingly spend more on their clothes.

The survey comes off the back of a new campaign challenging some of the UK’s largest clothes retailers to commit to ensuring workers’ safety and conditions in Bangladesh. A factory collapse in April, which killed over 1000 workers, resulted in a new Fire and Safety Accord to protect workers’ safety going forwards. Most UK  clothing retailers have signed up, but some are still refusing.

But they may need to think again. Most (78%) survey respondents said they thought UK companies were not transparent about conditions of factories in their supply chain and 76% think companies should be transparent. With almost three quarters of people saying they would willingly pay 5% more for clothing for a guarantee on fair pay and safe working conditions, do clothing companies need to start taking notice of our collective conscience?

Recent revelations about tax avoidance have resulting in some groups boycotting the likes of Amazon as consumer protest. You can be sure that Starbucks’ offer to pay additional tax only came about because of the sharp drop in consumer approval, and the resulting hit on shareholders’ profits. Having said that, consumers are a fickle bunch, and it would be interesting to see how many people are still boycotting Starbucks, now the scandal has blown over. Still if the profits of River Island, Matalan, Peacocks and, ironic champion of (UK) workers, Sports Direct take a tumble, perhaps we’ll know why.

Alternatively you now know where to go to buy cheap clothes. Unless you are River Island in which case there’s no excuse.

If you are so inclined, you can email the CEOs of the four companies, or tweet about their unethical practice, here.

Primark to sell their wares through ASOS

June 5th, 2013 1 Comment By Mof Gimmers

childcarryingclothes Primark to sell their wares through ASOSWant cheap clothes online? Well, Primark have done a deal with ASOS so they can sell their clothes on the internet for the first time.

Primark have said that the deal is a “very limited trial” as the company want to get an ‘insight into online retailing’. There’ll be a collection of 20 womenswear products, including a horrible studded parka.

A Primark spokesman said: ‘Primark is undertaking a very limited trial of online sales with ASOS. This trial relates to a small number of fashion items and will give the company some insight into online retailing.”

It makes sense for Primark to go online, as they’re one of the few retailers who haven’t suffered in economic gloom.

So there you have it. Primarni, now available online and ready to trounce the competition. We can only hope everyone else starts dropping their prices too.

Yoko Ono makes playful perv pants

November 29th, 2012 2 Comments By Mof Gimmers

Yoko Ono (comfortingly mental) has worked with a company called Opening Cermony and designed a menswear range for Christmas.

Interestingly, it is called ‘Fashions for Men: 1969-2012′, and was inspired by a book of hand-drawn illustrations drawn by Ono, which she presented to John Lennon for their wedding in ’69. Yoko crowbarring John Lennon’s name into something! Imagine!

ono1 200x300 Yoko Ono makes playful perv pants

As you can see from the pictures, the items are a bit pervy, with hands tickling the ballbags and, in one instance, a mesh revealing a bumcrack. Great if you have a pert, blemish-free arse. Awful for everyone else.

ono2 200x300 Yoko Ono makes playful perv pants

“I was inspired to create Fashions for Men amazed at how my man was looking so great,” Ono told VOGUE. “I felt that it was a pity if we could not make clothes emphasizing his very sexy bod. So, I made this whole series with love for his hot bod and gave it to him as a wedding present. You can imagine how he went wild and fell in love with me even more.”


Anyway, you can see more of the items by clicking these differently coloured words.

Anyone for Coca Cola fashionware? Thought not…

November 21st, 2012 6 Comments By Andy Dawson

Yes, sadly, it’s a thing. ‘Fashion’ clothes as dreamt up a multi-national fizzy drinks company, and presented at Fashion Rio recently. Which one is your favourite?

coca cola fw13 4 331x500 Anyone for Coca Cola fashionware? Thought not...

coca cola fw13 5 331x500 Anyone for Coca Cola fashionware? Thought not...

coca cola fw13 7 331x500 Anyone for Coca Cola fashionware? Thought not...

More to be marvelled at over at the delightfully-named ‘Fucking Young!’ blog…

Have Topshop been stealing designs again?

October 15th, 2012 10 Comments By Mof Gimmers

Topshop have been accused of stealing designs before and now, someone is claiming they’re doing it again. Kate Moross tweeted about the ‘theft’ and Twitter has kicked into action, shouting its head off about it all, with one user saying it was a “disgusting rip off” and another saying “thieving bastards”.

Have a look at the (admittedly awful) designs side-by-side. Alarmingly similar aren’t they?

topshop theft 500x349 Have Topshop been stealing designs again? You can see on Moross’ site that this is a pattern she’s used a lot and with Topshop having previous (along with a host of other large retailers), it looks like foul play.

Moross has worked with some big names in the past, including a nationwide billboard campaign for Cadburys, a number of record companies and… oddly enough… she’s done a signature clothing range for Topshop, so they’ve definitely heard of her.

dress 203x300 Womens dresses are a pain in the minge (help is at hand)Buying clothes that fit is a pain in the hole at the best of times. Imagine for one second you’re a woman (if you’re a woman, you won’t have to imagine too hard, unless you’re Jeanette Krankie) – thanks to the layout of your bodies, buying clothes is even more problematic. There’s all those boobs and hips to take into consideration.

Worse still, each shop you buy clothes from seems to have a complete disregard for the standard sizes they offer. A size 12 at one shop will be a size 16 somewhere else. What to do?

Well, mercifully for you ladies and cross-dressers, there’s an online calculator called What Size Am I? which has been developed by a lady called Anna Powell-Smith.

Anna says: “You think you’re a certain size, like a 10, and you could end up with something that won’t zip up or that hangs off. It made me realise sizes vary so much. When you look at all the shops’ websites, they all list measurements, so I’ve put them all in one place.”

“People might go to the same shops over and over again because they’re used to them, but knowing other places might flatter them more, this might encourage them to shop in different places. I couldn’t believe Next was the smallest.”

If you log on to, enter your bust, waist and hip measurements, you’ll be able to see calculations of what dress size you are at a variety of high street shops. Again, if you’re a man with a lady-partner, you might want to be considerate for the first time in your life and send her a link to this article.

Chinese clothes now giving you all good advice

November 17th, 2011 5 Comments By Mof Gimmers

Clothes made in China are not content to simply cover up your nudity. They also want to give you advice. Good advice too. Quite why, we’ve no idea.

good advice clothes label 500x298 Chinese clothes now giving you all good advice


Have you ever been in an Urban Outfitters? Did you survive the experience without maiming yourself and wishing you’d been born without eyes or a rudimentary memory? If so, you’ll be thrilled to learn that one of the most irritating shops on the high-street are now being accused of stealing independent designers designs. Again.

urban outfitters alleged theft 300x254 Urban Outfitters accused of stealing from independent designers

The Village Voice effectively accused Urban Outfitters of stealing designs a while ago (more on that here) and now, it would appear they’re at it again.

One young designer has a line of necklaces which features American states with hearts punched through them. The range are called I Heart Idaho and I Heart Mississippi and what-have-you. And now, Urban Outfitters are selling… well… exactly the same thing. Here is the independent designer’s work. Here is the designer’s accusation of idea theft. It’s all very grotty.

Of course, it isn’t the first time we’ve seen someone accusing a big chain of stealing an independent artist’s work. We wrote about Paperchase apologising for making off with someone’s designs. Poor form. Still, we imagine the worst element of all this, is the realisation that you have the same tastes as Urban Outfitters.

MPs rules mean newsreader presents show naked?

February 16th, 2011 4 Comments By Thewlis

adam and eve 183x300 MPs rules mean newsreader presents show naked?MPs eh? It’s not enough that they get a fat wedge £65,738, rising to £134,565 for cabinet ministers, but they also get an expense allowance of £20 grand, providing, of course they claim for legitimate expenses (not duck castles, or porn) as well as the whole summer off and that bulging public sector pension to look forward to.

But it’s not that I’m bitter (well, not much) it’s just that MPs seem to have one rule and every other British subject (with the possible exception of the Royal Family) have another.

You see, MPs claim expenses for a variety of things that ordinary mortals cannot. If you tried to claim your lunch as an expense, the tax man would laugh at you while sticking a big fat tax bill on your plate. But David Cameron has…

You see, the thing with lunch is that it cannot be said to be wholly and exclusively for business purposes. If you work full time, you are always out of the house at lunchtime, and have to feed yourself every day. You can therefore bring food from home and there is no ‘additional’ cost caused by your employment. If you choose to go out to lunch- even if it is with a client- that is your choice, and it’s your dollar. Your employer may choose to refund you, but that is up to them- YOU cannot claim it back as an expense of your employment.

For most employees, an expense will also be incurred only where every employee would have to incur that cost- that’s why childcare is not allowable, as not every employee needs childcare. However, for MPs, the requirement is one that “each and every MP or Minister would have to meet”. This is helpfully not defined anywhere, and even in the secretive MPs, Ministers and Tax booklet available only upon request in writing (which the BBC have helpfully scanned here), there are details of all the other allowances they can claim but no specific guidance as to whether these ‘parliamentary expenses’ are considered allowable for tax. I am sure all MPs would naturally consider their (hefty) mortgage interest charges to be allowable. If only we were allowed to do the same…

But perhaps the most fun could be had if we could instead claim for business clothing- or not as the case may be. Last year, newsreader Sian Williams (presenter of BBC Breakfast) took the taxman to court claiming that she should be allowed to deduct several thousands of pounds in hair, clothing and make up costs, being as she was on the telly. Previous cases had failed on the grounds that clothes were not exclusively used for a job, as they also provided warmth and decency. Ms Williams argued that the studio was warm and she was quite prepared to present Breakfast naked.

We think they should have held her to it. They didn’t and she lost her case. Perhaps another TV presenter should take up the gauntlet and offer to remain naked all the time in support of  a claim? Cheryl Cole perhaps?

HotUKDeals Of The Day – Thursday 2nd September

September 2nd, 2010 No Comments By Andy Dawson

hukd logob1 HotUKDeals Of The Day   Thursday 2nd SeptemberAre you in the business of keeping yourself looking smart and flashing your shiny white while om-nom-noming on a tub of ice cream? You are? Well come this way then…

Don’t mind those people over there – they’ve been beavering away at HotUKDeals, sniffing out the bargains for us all.

750146 1 HotUKDeals Of The Day   Thursday 2nd SeptemberDespite what the so-called television ‘funnymen’ like Bill Oddie and Roy Walker might say, there’s nothing wrong at all with supermarket clothing. It’s well made, it’s durable, it’s got a vague whiff of style about it sometimes and you can always wash your windows with it when it’s fucked.

All reasons why the announcement of a sale of Tesco’s finest garb is a cause for mass celebration. Skilfully use various codes and you can get up to 40% off and some cashback as well. Now won’t you look all lovely?

749684 1 HotUKDeals Of The Day   Thursday 2nd SeptemberOn a far more serious note, we move on to teeth. Possibly man’s deadliest natural weapon (with the talon coming a close second), it is believed that we have over 50,000 uses for our teeth, compared to just 7 for our toothless gums.

So children, look after your gnashers. You can do that and save some cash by partaking in a high-profile dental sale that’s going on right now. ‘Half price’ is what they’re roaring through their clenched pearly whites. Get on it.

750278 1 HotUKDeals Of The Day   Thursday 2nd SeptemberDo you hate your beautiful, shining teeth? Are you afraid to smile because they’re so bloody perfect? Have you smashed up all your mirrors in case you accidentally get a glimpse of them? Well do something about it you damn fool!

You could start by investing in some of this Asda Loaded Black Forest ice cream. It’s normally £2.47 for a 480ml tub but right now it’s only 50p. The wizards at HotUKDeals haven’t comfirmed whether it’s a nationwide offer or not but we can all dream until they do. Death to teeth!

(deals found by HUKD members Southern Bride, vadis and adamrwood)

Charity sabotages Asda clothes

July 21st, 2010 8 Comments By Mof Gimmers

asda basket 300x225 Charity sabotages Asda clothesDo you buy your clothes at Asda? If so, you should be ashamed of yourself. Mainly because the clothes found there are so woefully style-less that you may as well dress up in a cloth sack.

However, there are people who are more concerned about the people who make the rubbish clothes and they’ll be telling you all about their concerns by sneakily hiding messages in the pockets of garments.

Basically, ActionAid campaigners are slipping messages into thousands of items of clothing at Asda stores around the UK.

Their aim is to highlight what they call Asda’s “lamentable record on paying poverty wages to factory workers in developing countries”.

Of course, Asda deny these accusations and claim that they’ve taken lots of measures which will lead to better wages and working conditions for workers in places like Bangladesh.

Now, this might sound like plain old preachy bollocks, but ActionAid want to give you a prize as well. Basically, any customer that finds one of these messages will receive an ActionAid T-shirt and entry into a prize draw to win fair trade food and clothing. If you’re liking the idea of that, then maybe you could just go round all the pockets in George whilst doing your weekly shop.

Emily Armistead of ActionAid accused Asda of dragging its heels over the matter – and said the campaign’s aim was to “sneak this message directly to consumers right under Asda’s nose”.

“There’s a dark side to this company which is the way they treat the workers who actually make the clothes they sell. The women who work in factories in India, Bangladesh and other Asian countries struggle to feed their families despite working long hours in terrible conditions. We want to see fashion made fair, and we believe the British public agrees with us.”

ActionAid reckon that decent wages for workers would cost Asda an extra 2p on a £4 T-shirt, but the Wal-Mart owned company disagree.

“The idea that charging 2p more per garment would mean workers earned 2p more is disingenuous,” they said to Sky. “Experts who understand the issue know that the situation of workers in the Asian sub-continent is served best by intelligent action that improves factory conditions in a structured and sustainable way. Our pilot project with another NGO, GTZ, has already resulted in a 15% increase in wages in Bangladesh and it is our firm intention to roll out this innovative project to all our suppliers in the coming months and years.”

Aftershave? Check. Condoms in the wallet? Check. Pristine undercrackers? Check. Clean socks on? Check. Elastic band around your doo-dah to give the impression of a fuller, engorged member? Check. You’ve cut your nails and washed your willy and nearly ready to bag yourself a super-hot lady. All you need to do now is practise your chat-up lines and put on your sexiest outfit.

129152542268836069 420x500 Youre not fully dressed without a Bacon Tuxedo

As seen on Failblog, here’s the answer to every single man’s problems. From Stan’s Formalwear, you can bag yourself a suit made of bacon. Well, presumably it’s a suit that looks like it’s made from bacon. Strut in sty-le and she’ll be all over you like a rash-er. I’ll kill myself now shall I?

Spotted by Bitterwallet devotee Orla