Posts Tagged ‘belgium’

Commercial Break: Don’t push the button!

April 11th, 2012 5 Comments By Andy Dawson

You stupid humans. You can’t resist opening Pandora’s Box when it’s put in front of you, can you? You Belgians are the worst, as demonstrated in this promo video as put together by one of your TV channels.

An innocuous-looking ‘Push To Add Drama’ button is placed in a quiet square somewhere in Belgium and lo and behold, some nosy parkers go and push it. Witness the carnage…

On Monday we reported the story that students had revolted against Ryanair when staff challenged them concerning excess baggage fees. Over 100 passengers were denied boarding the flight from Lanzarote to Charleroi in Belgium, and all were banned from flying Ryanair in the future.

In response to media coverage of the event, Ryanair have played their linkbait card; the airline has “released the YouTube guide to packing, to allow these students avoid embarrassing themselves, and Belgium, further with their refusals to comply with the airline policies and instructions, as they agreed to do at the time of booking.”

According to the airline, the tutorial demonstrates how passengers can pack enough clothes for a two week holiday into one 10 kg carry-on bag. Ryanair’s chief word-mangler Stephen McNamara said:

“Ryanair is today calling on Belgian universities to ensure no further embarrassing international episodes when their students travel abroad by providing them with an online tutorial in how to pack light. This tutorial will allow these students to comply with the airline policies they accept when booking a flight.”

In fact Ryanair didn’t release the video – it’s been on YouTube since last year and was published by some dude in Thailand. The self-titled “master-packer” also chooses to travel without a toothbrush or any sort of toiletries, and the video doesn’t state whether or not the total weight is under 10kg. It looks a little on the heavy side for us. We’re going to have a play with the laundry tonight to double-check.

Alfa Romeo have enjoyed decades as a car-maker of some distinction, so you’d expect their marketing campaigns to be infused with plenty of class and gravitas. But this is the wacky world of advertising, where a rank-bad idea can somehow be universally accepted by the decision-makers and before you know it, shame an embarrassment is everywhere and a reputation lies on the floor, burst to bits and twitching.

So, here’s the new Alfa Romeo ad from Belgium – it’s a remote-controlled shopping mall advert that follows the punters around, hassling them and generally getting right on their tits.

Is this the kind of handling we can expect from the latest Alfas? Careering around all over the place like Bambi on ice? Bumping into stuff all hither and thither? Might be worth parking this one and getting a cab back to the drawing board…

We’re not sure which of the two facts is more surprising; that Belgium appears to be the bleakest place on Earth, or that the Belgians have a sense of humour.

Belgium has to put up with a mobile service provider called Mobistar, legendary amongst customers for its shitty customer service. Despite years of complaints, little-to-no improvements have been made.

A comedy show called Basta decided to take revenge. A steel container was delivered early one morning to block the gates of the Mobistar car park; when Mobistar employees called the customer services number on the outside of the container, the performers were inside to take their calls, perform on-hold music and generally tit about.

We’d pay Basta to do something similar to 3 on behalf of our readers, but return flights to India are quite costly at this time of year.

Ryanair New Plane Logo 214x300 Silly French cut off nose to spite face over Ryanair flightCommon sense will tell you, hopefully, that if an airport is shrouded in fog then a plane probably shouldn’t try and land there. That the already small-but-present risk of certain death inherent to landing increases several hundred-fold by not being able to see the runway – you’d think people would be reasonable about that.

But not the French.

Over 100 passengers, mostly French, refused to depart a Ryanair flight that had been diverted to Belgium due to bad wearther. The flight from Morocco was due to land at Beauvais in northern France late on Tuesday night, when fog forced it and three other flights to land at the next closest available airport, Liege in Belgium.

Ryanair rolled out the coaches to transfer passengers back to Beauvais, and presumably most Ryanair passengers wouldn’t have had an issue with their final destination being 200 miles from the airport. Despite this, the French dug their heels in and staged a sit-in protest on the plane for four hours. That’d show the fog. After the first hour, the captain and crew gave up, got off the plane and locked the doors.

Perhaps somebody amongst the French party eventually did a little basic mathematics and concluded by the time they eventually left the plane yesterday morning, they could have taken the coach and been home in Beauvais already. Zut alores!

There are some very clever, astute, genre-defining creative folk working in advertising, who lure you in to spend your pennies on mediocrity through an well-executed, award-winning idea.

And then there are the Belgians:

the most offensive ad ever 4511 1251131552 4 Belgian magazine advertisement is plane offensive

[BuzzFeed]