Not An Actual Sperm Bank

While us Brits slouch around moaning about the cr***t cr***h and wondering why we’re all skint, enterprising male Aussie backpackers are seizing every opportunity to make the quick cash that will allow them to extend their stay in Blighty.

And they’re not the only things that are being seized and extended – the boys are throwing their lot behind Britain’s sagging sperm banks, bagging themselves a few quid, and helping to repopulate the country that banished their ancestors in the first place.

Still, it means we might have a decent England cricket team by 2033…