While Eastenders was tarting about making live shows and cracking open Bradley’s skull like it was a soft boiled egg being hit with a monkey wrench, Coronation Street is going to get you fat and pissed.

Yep, retailers will be able to stock Cor­onation Street-branded products to mark the 50th anniversary of the ITV soap.

This means you’ll be able to get so drunk that you go blind in your ears on Newton and Ridley ale (made in association with JW Lees) and then soak up your crushing hangover the following morning with a portion of Betty’s Hot Pot.

Holland’s Pies is taking care of the food side of things and will make the range of Corrie grub available in supermarkets.

The products are part of ITV Global Entertainment’s plan to make the anniversary a key marketing, promotional and licensing platform this year.

Of course, this means that all these releases will be promoted through adverts, presumably online and on the television box machine.

That’s not all Corrie will be pushing though. As well as a ‘Best of British Brands’ promotion with Warburtons, Typhoo and Imperial Leather, from next month, fans of Coronation Street will be able to play a Nintendo Wii game featuring their favourite characters.

Rumour has it that the game will be a Mortal Kombat style gore-fest and gamers will be able to play as a host of classic characters from the soap. One clip seen at the Bitterwallet office saw a collective dry-wretch as it appeared to show Bet Lynch hoiking Emily Bishop’s head off with her labia, leaving the veteran actress decapitated with her spine swinging freely from the skull.

Another screengrab appeared to show Rita Fairclough being impaled in a pit of spikes after being torched by a naked Curly Watts. Should be good fun, eh?

[BrandRepublic]

Consumer-powered guerrilla warfare – that’s what we’re calling it here at Bitterwallet. Avid Bitterwallet reader The Couch has emailed about how MSE forum members are sticking it to the operators of an unloved private parking company.

The business is called PCN-UK Ltd and is operated by Ashford S Wood. According to the forum members on MSE, PCN-UK makes its money by issuing unenforceable parking tickets then threatening people who refuse to pay with bailiffs and court action.

MSE members began to draw attention to the business and pointed out the glaring legal errors in their procedures, and when one member turned to the forums for advice over the threat of court action, he received threatening messages from PCN-UK. If you want further examples of their incapacity for understanding the law or punctuation, read the company’s signage, what happens if you choose not pay or the FAQs on their website. Our favourite quote is:

“People on internet forums are nobody’s who don’t have a life and like to get people into trouble by giving them incorrect advice… if you don’t want to pay that’s fine, but just expect more costs and home visits.”

Them nobody’s on the interwebz! To read those FAQs in full, you’ll have to read the cached version of the page we linked to above – PCN-UK didn’t renew their domain name (or had it revoked), and today a new site was launched in its place:

A Facebook group has been set up in the company’s name, there are dubious Twitter accounts for both Woods and PCN-UK, while Wood’s mobile number has inexplicably cropped up on several Gumtree ads, including this one offering a free Xbox and this one offering special man love:

All websites relating to Wood’s other business interests seem to be inactive, too. According to forum members, Wood wasn’t registered with the SIA (which he would need to be for the purposes of vehicle clamping) or the BPA. Regardless, the previous PCN-UK website displayed logos from both companies, as well as that of the ICO – which may or may not have had a hand in closing down the website.

Whether the company is still operating or will simply reappear under a new name seems unclear right now, but it’s guaranteed PCN-UK Ltd and those involved won’t enjoy a quiet life in the future, thanks to consumer determination, perseverance and liberal use of bottom humour.

As pointed out by Andy yesterday it’s now been one year since Bitterwallet sprang out from the womb of HUKD swaddled in consumer wrath and clutching a Tesco yellow label. It’s been an interesting and occasionally exciting year as we found our voice as a site and started to gather faithful (some lovingly faithful and some hate-ingly faithful) Bitterwalleters both in comments and email tips.

Statistically here’s what happened in the past year:
- 2.4m visits
- 4m pageviews
- 24,722 comments
- 2,785 posts

The top read posts with 300k reads between them were:

- Probably supposed to be ready for a shot
- Orange increase charges – can you cancel your Orange contract
- Cancelling your Orange contract – A troubleshooting guide
- Brutal honest on the NY subway
- Who’s hungry for a whole chicken in a can
- Breaking news – Further emergency meetings at PC World
- Breaking news – DSGi emergency meetings store restructuring
- The 20p coin
- Cancel your Orange contract – official statement from Ofcom
- Bitterwallet readers force Orange to scrap new call charges

There’s lots of areas we want to improve in yet. We’d like to get more voices on here with experience in different consumer areas, such as personal/data privacy, consumer law and retailer inside knowledge. We’d like to develop more guides that are solid consumer resources for recurring subjects. We’d also like to dig up more insider dirt and tips from “those in the know”. If you’re interested and passionate in any of these areas and can channel the Bitterwallet spirit please feel free to get in touch.

In the last half of our first year we think we’ve raised our game by taking on some more complex consumer issues (like the Orange and T-mobile contract changes) and we’d really like to get our teeth into more of those issues. We have some good legal resources to draw upon now that have been helping us with these issues so we’re getting into a better position to tackle these.

That aside, where do you think we’re getting better, where do we need to improve and importantly, what do you want to see here on Bitterwallet?

Thanks to all those who have helped us with tips, advice, comments and corrections over the past year. Without your feedback we’re shooting blind and without collective knowledge! We’re looking forward to where this next year will take Bitterwallet…

Who was it that said: “He who looks back is class”? We’re not sure, but we get his vibe.

So here’s the best bits from the past week at Bitterwallet. Suck it in you babies…

• Tesco – Jedi-haters or just tolerant of a bloke who insists on being a bit of a prick?
• The BBC Watchdog PS3 debacle rumbled on. One man said the Beeb told him to make stuff up.
• Noel Edmonds – owner of a tidy beard and inspiration for a beautiful iPhone app.
• An interesting online ad – there’s not many of them you know.
• We’re out of our depth with the Asda butler. Well out of it. Please don’t hurt us Ken.
• Free wigs at Starbucks! Hang on, it’s free WiFi. Almost as good.
• Apple made to look like sad losers as Microsoft unveil their tablet/booklet thingameedoo.
• Bitterwallet desperately wanted to throw a Windows 7 launch party. Microsoft wouldn’t let us.
• More crowd-sourcing – send us your pics of former Woolworths branches please.
• Quique’s got his head screwed on. Or rather he should have – on to a desk or something similarly sturdy.

In order to avoid offending people who aren’t of a fanboy persuasion, we’ve harvested a few Apple stories together before shunting them into the weekend, when no one’s looking. Happy with that you moaning bunch of freaks?

First up, a recession-busting protective cover for your iPhone, called the Recession Cover, and made from bog-standard cardboard (left). It retails for just 99 cents (about 60p) with free postage within the US. There’s no warranty, nothing to protect your iPhone’s screen and the makers proudly claim that it’s flammable if you hold a match to it. Nice. [Consumerist]

Next comes a more elaborate add-on – the iTwinge (right). It’s a physical keyboard holster that slips over the part of your screen where you do your typing. With what can only be described as ‘tiny nipples’ on the underside of its keys, it’s an enormous boon for anyone who wants the feel of a real keyboard. And hell, we’re always on the look out for enormous boons. [Gizmodo]

What’s this? Why it’s WorkSnug, a spooky new app designed to help you find somewhere nice that’s got WiFi. How does it work? You simply hold up your iPhone and it’ll recognise where you are – then point you in the direction of the nearest WiFi spot as well as provide you with a quick review. Except it only works in London. Oh, and it’s not out yet. Bah! [WorkSnug]

Finally, a collector’s piece. An Apple Macintosh 128 that hails from way back in 1984 (left). The 776^th one to be made don’t you know and one that used to belong to someone a bit famous. It was owned by none other than Star Trek creator Gene Rodenberry and is up for auction at the beginning of October. It’s expected to sell for somewhere between $800 – $1200 but we’d be amazed if it went that cheap. The combination of Apple + Star Trek should have monied geeks snorting into their Cheerios at the thought of getting their hands on such a useless, enchanting piece of equipment. [Gizmodo]

Your PSP for £15, yesterday

I once had a first edition of Harry Potter (Prisoner of Azkaban) at its popularity peak. Bought it for a few hundred quid, and sold it for 5 figures. Of course, buying one-off books at ridiculous prices is not the smartest way to go about making eBay into a sideline business. You’re better off steadily selling £5 USB hubs and bra enhancers than grabbing the occasional windfall when the opportunity is ripe. For both newbies and veterans to eBay, here are some reminders to increase your profits on eBay:

1. Don’t buy add ons: If you are just starting out on eBay, don’t buy the add-ons when you do your listing until you figure out the conversions for your particular market. As tempting as the slide shows may be, you don’t really need them. Other fancy eye-catching options may increase the click throughs, but aren’t you spending enough on listing and FVF (final value fees) already?

2. Don’t buy stuff. Nothing cuts into your profit like spending it on a large carrot, or a ‘I love Gary Glitter’ bumper sticker. If you’re listing on eBay, avoid going on a spending spree. Better yet, consider alternative bulk listing programs such as Auctiva or Turbo Lister to keep your focus and productivity.

3. Sell old stuff. No need to go scouting in the mountains of Nauru for diamonds in the rough. If you have it and you don’t use it, why not sell it? Consider everything you own that you haven’t touched in the last 6 months, from books, antiques, to old gadgets and electronics … It is truly amazing what you will find in the storage room boxes.

As a side note, if you’re not a big fan of selling on eBay? HUKD also has a great for sale / for trade section worth checking out.

4. Be realistic. Just because those extra high end cotton wools or your old breast implants are valuable to you doesn’t mean anyone else will find it very valuable. And if something is extremely sentimental to you, the few quid you’ll profit from it is probably not worth selling.

5. Take good photos. Use natural lighting vs. flash when possible. Multiple clean photos increase conversions so in certain circumstances (such as books and laptops) are an exception to the “don’t buy add-ons” suggestion above.

6. Research. Before setting your opening bid, do some homework. What are comparable items going for? Well trained shoppers scan by price, so choose an opening bid or ‘buy it now’ price that lures them in. Look at current retail price and how well comparable items hold their resale value. Focus on generating buzz instead of profiteering. The bids will bubble up to where they ought to be.

7. Know your P&Ps. For heavier / bulkier items, figure up how much you’ll pay for packing materials and shipping. For international shipping alternatives to Royal Mail, you guys made some great suggestions.You can go to the Royal Mail price finder and make a pretty good estimate of what you’ll have to pay for postage. Make sure you charge enough in shipping to cover your costs.

8. Paypal…. the payment system we all love to hate. While they can truly be a pain in the arse with account limitations, fee extortions, and the lack of protection for certain types of products (such as digital goods), it still beats cashing a cheque, waiting for it to clear, western union (unless you’re a Nigerian scammer) and skill swapping. For items posted recorded or special delivery with tracking, the seller/buyer protection scheme is still probably worth the extra ‘insurance’.

eBay going commercial may be making the auction giant alot more saturated these days, but there is still money to be made. Once you settle into a groove of listing and selling regularly, you can bring in enough extra to fund those luxuries you’ve been denying yourself because of the recession. High end cotton wools for sale, anyone?

Now you won't get burned until you get there.

Thomas Cook claim they’re going to enhance the whole tricky online holiday-booking experience with the introduction of live advice from their customer service agents while you’re booking your break.

They say the web chat feature will be triggered if a customer receives an error message or has been stuck on a particular results page for a long period of time. An invitation to chat with a customer service agent will then appear on the screen with the transcript later emailed to the customer for reference.

Sounds fair enough, but we want to see the service expanded before we start clapping excitedly at Thomas Cook. We want to holiday while wearing headsets with cameras in them so we can consult the travel agent at any time, day or night. With questions like…

How genuine is this Rolex that the big man on the beach is trying to sell to me?

This girl I’m buying Pina Coladas for even though only one side of her face seems to be working – what’s the deal with that then?

I’ve been throwing up for eleven straight hours now – when will it stop?

I’m drinking free Sangria at a timeshare presentation. It all seems like a fantastic deal – I should sign the papers shouldn’t I?

I’m languishing in a Cypriot jail because I threw a pool cue at the barman. My flight is in 14 hours – can you ring the British consul and get me out?

Bring us THAT level of service so-called Thomas Cook and you can have a highly sought after Bitterwallet gold sash.

Here’s a good reason to set up password protected Windows accounts at home: Little Pipi Quinlan, age three, of Stanmore Bay north of Auckland, NZ purchased a construction digger for £8,000 on an auction site.

She didn’t get to the auction site from scratch, but she continued browsing the diggers her mother was looking at on the TradeMe auction site, New Zealand’s answer to eBay. Now, mum was looking for toy diggers, but left up a page of real diggers, one of which Pipi bought early in the morning before her parents were awake.

Mum found out about it from an email congratulating her on winning the auction and assuring her she would find the digger more than satisfactory. But it was the bill for NZ$20,000 that left her gobsmacked. Fortunately, the seller of the digger was a sport about it and reversed the sale.

So let this be a lesson to you online shoppers used to leaving your browsers open. Log out or use a screen saver with a password, lest your cat take a nap on the keyboard and accidentally buy you 4 million pairs of latex thong knickers.

[Guardian]

All customers want is a little fair play

While most customers seem very pleased with Play, thanks to their kick ass prices, others have raised issues with replacing damaged/defective goods on time issues with obtaining refunds on postage costs.

So as a followup to our previous post on damaged goods in transit from Play.com, we decided to speak with the Play team. Here is a summary of what their super friendly customer service team informed us:

1. Play.com is based in Jersey. This means that the terms and conditions of sale that we enjoy here in mainland Britain may not apply. It may be worth checking their T&C.

2. Royal Mail handles Play items under £40 (as a general rule). Their standard delivery time is 3-5 working days, but RM’s rules is to wait 21 days before handling items. This is why if goods do not turn up within the advertised 4 days, you are told by customer services to allow 21 days for it to arrive.

3. Fragile packages should have been sent out in cardboard boxes directly from the warehouse. If items were not shipped out in proper packaging that it would be a ‘mishandling’ case. In the first instance, customers should report damaged/defective goods via phone or online. You can reach their CS as a 1st point of call (SayNoto870: 028 90921724). Play will issue return authorization details and a return address within 24 hours (or less). It may be a good idea to make copies of these.

4. Send the item with your invoice and return authorisation email for deliveries sent via RM. Customers who have not received refunds on postage costs involved are suggested to email play. Play will automatically cover P&P in the first instance with a standard postage refund set at £1.40. This can be disputed as long as customers kept hold of their proof of delivery and receipt for higher priced deliveries. Items priced over £40 are sent via the Home Delivery Network, and Play will arrange for a collection to go out to customer.

5. While Play should be first point of call within the first 28 days, the manufacturers often could replace items within the first 6 months. Play has arrangements with manufacturers for defective goods, so past the initial 28 days, customers are advised to contact manufacturer who may directly replace their goods. Otherwise, Play will help as long as you obtain a “fault reference number” from the manuactuerer. If the item falls outside of a year, you will need a independent fault report to prove the actual product is defective/damaged.

You can also of course try the Jersey trading standards office on 01534 448160, but we would advocate doing this only if they sent you a whole chicken in a can instead of your Star Wars R2-D2 trash can. Then, feel free to make some noise.

The motor industry have all but confirmed that there’s no immediate end in sight to the car sales crisis with NEXT year’s British International Motor Show cancelled for the first time since 1939.

The show, was supposed to be held at the Excel Centre in London’s Docklands next summer but has been called off 15 months early as the gloom surrounding the car industry deepens. Bad news for petrolheads and aspiring glamour models everywhere.

The Society of Motor Manufacturers and Traders have said that car manufacturers were unable to commit to appearing at the event, leaving them no option but to scrap what is the UK’s largest consumer exhibition.

It’s bad news but not the end of the world. However, if this downturn gets any worse and they end up cancelling the Ideal Home Show, the Chelsea Flower Show or any cheese rolling festivals, we’re going to go titting apeshit.

Right, Deals Of The Day then. It’s about four days late but no one complained so we’re not even sure if anyone’s reading this. Hey ho – let’s get on with it then.

The rules are simple – we tell you about some of the bargains on HotUKDeals that have tickled our eyes, and you either ignore them or buy them. We all then keep the results secret. Simple.

First today, a chance to get a 2-for-1 entrance ticket for some of the UK’s top attractions, including Alton Towers, Thorpe Park, Legoland Windsor, Ireland Town and Lake Getawayfromme.

Might not have got all of those names right – you’d better check out the full details here. Either way, it looks as though the deal will cost you no more than a packet of bubble gum, which you might need to aid your escape from Lake Getawayfromme.

Next, a heads up for this weekend’s Mother’s Day extravaganza. As has become traditional, the BBC will be closing down for the duration of the day and the sun will completely disappear from the sky for a two-minute spell at 12.02pm.

You can ease the pain by stocking up on a special Marks & Spencer ‘4 Dine for £15’ Meal Deal fiasco type thing – a main dish, large side dish, dessert plus a bottle of wine for four people. A bottle of wine for four people – it’d better be a big ‘un. Full menu here…

Lastly, if you’re looking for the kind of gift that could strengthen the relationship between yourself and your lovely old mum, the pair of you could do a lot worse than the first four series of The Wire on DVD – available in total for £40.

She’s sure to enjoy to slowly-unfolding saga of criminal life in the run-down projects of Baltimore, seen through the eyes of that city’s beleaguered police force. And if she doesn’t, sod her, you can keep them all for yourself.

(deals found by Happy_man, dd1129 and thimmmmmeh87)

Lastminute.com – purveyors of travel offers and the excellent secret hotel deals – have developed a new application for the G1 mobile phone. NRU uses a visual interface to locate deals near you (near you – NRU – do you see? Do you?) by combining the G1’s GPS and compass.

It’s a very neat way to find your way around an unknown locale, but don’t pay too much attention to the video; you don’t have to be an off-duty bin man to enjoy using it.

[Travolution]

Welcome to our afternoon sideshow, where hot offers flicker and flutter tantalisingly before your eyes like drunken nymphs in a disco. We talk of course of Deals Of The Day.

So sit back, strap on your special relaxing hands, crane your neck OVER HERE and look at these bargains. Stare deeply into their eyes, they’re not afraid of you so you shouldn’t be fearful of them. Only fear the power of HotUKDeals, from whence they came.

First up, if you’re a Sky subscriber, you can get your hands on a BOGOF deal with Pizza Hut. Go here to find out which internetular hoops you’ll need to jump through in order to finally get a couple of PH pizzas for the same price as you’d always pay in a non-franchised shop.

Hopefully the whole thing will help to try and take some of the sting out of the fact that the price of Sky’s full package is nothing short of a disgrace, particularly if you’ve got multiroom and HD heaped on top as well. God, that’s taken some of the fun out of the proceedings. Enjoy your dinner though.

Queen – what a band eh?. When you’re 15. Although, to be fair, they’re still about a squillion times more fun than modern losers like The Kooks or White Lies. Now you can bag a 2-disc DVD with all of their classic early hits on it – just £8.49.

Marvel at Freddie Mercury’s rampantly-heterosexual 1970s peacocking. Christ, we didn’t have a clue did we? Behold Brian May’s hair, still EXACTLY the same in 2009 as it was 35 years ago. Probably something to do with his interest in astronomy. And he made his guitar out of an old fireplace you know. Oh, I could go on all day….

But I won’t, because there’s just time for one more super-bargain and it’s this – a 24cm frying pan for just a fiver (RRP £13.69) just in time for Shrove Tuesday, which is TOMORROW!

Yes, we hadn’t realised either. There doesn’t seem to be a night of pancake-dedicated programming across the BBC, for the first time in about 50 years, and ITV1 aren’t showing The Christopher Biggins Pancake Pantomime Showboat, a massive break in tradition. They’ll be telling us the FA Cup means nothing next…

(deals found by rumpelstiltskin1, bigflump and Lola_81)

You might notice the lights going out on some of your friends on Facebook, Twitter, MySpace and wherever they have an avatar of themselves. If instead of their gurning features you see nothing but inky blackness, you’ll know they’ve devoted themselves to a cause, one raging on the other side of the world.

New Zealand MPs are about to vote on a law that will grant the power to Internet Service Providers (ISPs) to cut-off internet connections if they think a website has copied somebody’s work. The root of the upset is Section 92 of the Copyright Amendment Act which assumes guilt upon accusation. That sounds head-chewingly dull, but it has serious consequences for anyone and everyone using the internet. The parts of the act concerning copyright infringement (92a and 92c) state ISPs can shut down websites and terminate connections without any evidence of infringement.

Does it matter? The law, if passed, could have far-reaching implications, for pretty much everyone using the internet in New Zealand; a lack of proof wouldn’t necessarily prevent an ISP closing down the website and switching off the connection. Many ISPs would rather let people go about their business online, but if passed into law they’ll be forced to investigate all complaints. The fun mischief makers could have.

The internet has blurred so many lines concerning copyright and usage that it’s all a flickering haze of photons, but there is something altogether Orwellian in passing a law that allows a personal or business websites to be switched off, or material removed without any evidence of wrong-doing being required. A website called Creative Freedom NZ is fighting back, and actively encouraging people to support their cause; accept that copyright laws are required, but laws that take into account technology and how material is used. Supporters can upload a new avatar from the site – an all-black square of despair; it also happens to be this season’s colour, so you can show support and still look good online.

It’s the middle of January, we’re all a bit skint and it’s too miserable outside to go anywhere other than the local shop for the barest of essentials. These are grim times.

Sod that for a kettle of ball games – let’s go crazy! Let’s get nuts! (as Prince said). Let’s look for the purple banana before they throw us in the truck (as he also said, although that’s slightly less meaningful.) Here’s some getting-away-from-it-all greatness thanks to HotUKDeals…

Who fancies dinner and a top London show for just £20 a head? “Yeah right” we hear you cry – “a busker outside a tube station followed by a bag of chips.” Now would we do that to you? Well, to some of you, maybe…

No, it’s all legit and above board. Shows include The Sound Of Music, Joseph, Stomp and Peter Shilton – The Musical. Hang on, word’s just reached us that Peter Shilton is a total sell-out.
(deal found  by misfire22)
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