According to Metro, John Brown had popped in to buy a few bits, and went to the self-service checkout and expected to pay around a fiver for his goods, and just paid it on his debit card without any further concern.
Only a few days later, when he went to get some money out of the bank to buy a car, and the bank went all ‘insufficient funds’ on his ass, did he realise.
Fortunately, he’s one of these people who keep receipts, and discovered that the reduced loaf that he had expected to pay 69p for, was in fact £450.
Perhaps a couple of lessons can be drawn from this experience, with the main one being “DUDE, focus and look at the total before paying”.
Anyway, Asda have been lovely and refunded the money, saying it was a system glitch and apologised for any inconvenience etc etc.
Great, yeah? Erm, anyway.
A submerged car, which became the unofficial symbol of the Somerset floods, has apparently been sold for £101,100 on eBay.
The Seat Toledo was sold by Hubert Zajaczkowski to raise money for a charity.
The car was abandoned near Muchelney on Christmas Eve and would soon be seen on news reports, popping up and bobbing along underwater-ly like a four-door whale.
In the sale description, Mr Zajaczkowski wrote:
“Genuine Seat Toledo from the floods in Somerset. Obviously NOT in working condition, but my aim is to sell the car and donate the money to a charity which is helping with the floods. Any questions please message me. Collection only.”
Mr Zajaczkowski is new to the eBay game, and is not sure if the bid is genuine or not, but according to eBay’s terms and conditions, a bid or purchase on eBay is considered a contract and you’re obliged to purchase the item unless the seller is willing to cancel the transaction. So there.
Do you like cycling? Are you a fan of shoegazing hitmakers Ride? Then have we found the ideal garment for YOU.
Groovy cycle wear shop Milltag have designed a set of bike gear based on the Ride logo, which is cunningly, something you do on a bike!
According to the site, the band themselves are all fine with it, especially as bassist Steve Queralt is a keen cyclist himself.
They’ve even added a ‘Leave Them All Behind’ reference in the garment too. Amazing.
Edd Joseph thought he’d bought a PS3 on Gumtree, but it didn’t arrive. Out of pocket and annoyed, Joseph decided to get back at the online vendor by sending him the Complete Works of Shakespeare by text message.
All 29,000 of them.
Mercifully for Edd, he was on an unlimited contract, which meant he didn’t have to fork out for the dizzying amount of SMS messages he was sending. It didn’t take him an age to cut and paste the whole thing either, thanks to copying the entire text with a single click on an iPhone app.
Of course, Joseph went through the process of trying to get a refund, going to the police and contacting the seller (a certain ‘David Williams’, so keep an eye out for him), but it was to no avail.
Talking about his revenge, Edd Joseph said: “I was really annoyed and I was trying to think of ways of being more in the position of power because I felt so helpless about it. My first thought was that I could try and pretend I had found out where he lived but it was all a bit of a cliche and it wasn’t going to worry him really.”
“Then it just occurred to me you can copy and paste things from the internet and into a text message. It got me thinking, ‘what can I sent to him’ which turned to ‘what is a really long book’, which ended with me sending him Macbeth.”
Naturally, since this bombardment of Shakespeare started, the vendor has been replying with angry messages of his own.
“I got the first reply after an hour, and then a few more abusive messages after that,” Edd said. “Recently he has taken to calling me and giving me abuse on the phone. I tried to ask him if he was enjoying the plays, but he was very confused. I’m going to keep doing it. If nothing else I’m sharing a little bit of culture with someone who probably doesn’t have much experience of it.”
Berlin. It’s the home of baseball isn’t it. It isn’t?
Well, according to German Amazon.de listings for ‘Bondage Fetish Mega Dildos‘, they’ve certainly found a home for baseball. Or at least the Basballschlägel (baseball bat – German Ed) any road. And that home is up the arse.
For 25.95 Euros, you can get The Berlin Slugger, or perhaps the more hygienic among you may prefer the aluminium elegance of The Weisendorf Wanger for 34.95 Euros. Oooh! Choices!
The company listed as the supplier of these items is called FEIHOFF Sarl, and a brief gander at their other wares suggest various levels of unsavouriness, such as the sex toys based on dogs, horses, and, um, whales.
Whatever next, eh? (Actually don’t answer that, we’re scared). Now, a singalong if you know the words!
Nimm mich mit zum Ballspiel! Nehmen Sie mich mit der Menge!
Kaufen Sie mir ein paar Erdnüsse und Crackerjacks!
Es ist mir egal, wenn ich nie wieder!
Lassen Sie mich root! root! root!
Für die Heimmannschaft! Wenn sie nicht gewinnen, es ist eine Schande,
Aahh, Denn es ist eines, zwei, drei Treffer sind Sie aus
An der alten Ballspiel!
Tesco are desperate to win everyone over again and so, seemingly having a look at the internet to see what people fizz with enthusiasm over, they’ve decided to look at becoming a pizza delivery service. Presumably, they thought about cats, Drake and big booties and couldn’t work out how to sell those, first.
The retailer is launching a trial of this pizza delivery service at the new Tesco Extra store in Streatham in South London. This particular outlet is located in a social housing scheme which has hundreds of flats.
Tesco’s director for London, Andrew Yaxley, said: “The pizza delivery idea came from the local store manager and is about trying new things.”
Of course, there’s good money in pizza delivery. The market is worth £6.9 billion in the UK and Domino’s and Pizza Hut are doing very, very well out of it. However, would anyone really want Tesco to make them a pizza and deliver it to them? If the store is within your estate, you could walk there. If you want one delivered, you’ll probably want something greasy and pleasingly nasty, which you can get delivered to you from a local takeaway already.
They haven’t exactly found a gap in the market have they?
Tesco are allowing store managers to try more things out and the big bosses are allowing a certain flexibility to each store, which means that there could be a load of new initiatives cropping up all over the country. This approach is a bid to win some hearts and minds after Tesco admitted it had an image problem.
If they want to win everyone over, they might think about improving their products and looking at their prices first, eh?
You may recall a fine, fine review spotted on a dodgy bootleg of Old Boy we shared (if you missed it, have a look here) and it seems to be quite the thing in the Far East.
Now, a knock-off of Shrek sees another killer one-line review which says “good, but not great.” Wouldn’t it be nice if all film blurb was that honest?
Do you like trainers? Do you like The Beatles?
Then today is your lucky day, as Vans have just announced a range of footwear based on the Hey Jude hitmakers’ Yellow Submarine animations.
One can choose from a range of styles, with a couple also available for toddlers, so you can foist your obsession onto the next generation.
Vans sez: “The world’s most iconic band of all time, taps into the Off the Wall spirit in a collaboration for the ages. Vans and The Beatles join forces in March 2014 to release a collection of footwear showcasing the unique artwork from the legendary Yellow Submarine album and film.
Released in 1968, Yellow Submarine represents the perfect blend of good music and unique artwork highlighted on four original Vans Classics. This collaboration is the first of its kind and delivers an offering of artwork and colors taken directly from the album cover”.
There’s also a handy link for more information on The Beatles too. They’ve literally thought of everything. As they’ve got Ringo on them, careful you don’t start walking out of time.
Buzzfeed – the Sunday afternoon repeats of the internet – have seemingly stumbled across some Bitterwallet japery. If you look for PC World on Google, the official tile shows this as the companies logo.
And if you hover over the image, what will you see?
There it is. Our name.
You can try it for yourself as, at the time of publication, Google or PC World haven’t actually managed to remove it or correct the error.
We’re puerile enough to be thrilled by this and we’re happy that someone has finally managed to find our little Easter Egg.
The brand mark, entitled Reebok Delta, aims to reflect the company’s new ‘singular focus on fitness’
It’s already being used online, and will be applied to all the brand’s clothing and footwear based in training, running, outdoor, yoga and aerobics
Apparently, adding the Delta symbol represents “the positive and transformative change that fitness can have on a person’s life”, according to Reebok, and the three arms that form the triangular device relate to the physical, mental and social changes that fitness inspires in people. Of course they do.
Matt O’Toole, Reebok chief marketing officer, says, “The new brand mark signals a clear purpose for our brand and it will be a badge for those who pursue a fuller life through fitness.”
“It is our symbol of change – an invitation to take part, and to unlock your true potential. It’s not a logo, it’s a symbol…a way of life.”
TRAINERS WITH A TRIANGLE ON – A WAY OF LIFE.
Frozen food giant Birds Eye is launching a new branding and packaging as part of a £60 million Europe-wide relaunch.
They’ve ditched the salty dog Captain Birdseye and his keen crew of suspiciously young seamen (which is probably wise, in this Yewtree era), although there’s no word on whether that polar bear character has been given his P-45 yet.
The campaign, called The Food of Life, aims to ‘champion real food and the way real people eat and interact at meal times’. Shall we have a look at it?
Birds Eye are also trebling their digital spend, and increasing its presence on social media. Overall, the company should be spending approximately £16m in 2014 alone.
That means you’ll be hounded by them, day and night, like a seafarer who can’t unsee the terrors of the ocean.
River Island have brought out a t-shirt with the word ‘Homeless’ on it.
The clothing chain, favoured mostly by those wanting a step-up from Primark, have been quietly selling the item on their website for a little while for a not entirely unreasonable £16.
The website reckons it will “Give your day a quirky talking point in this black and white “homeless New York City” print t-shirt”.
“We plan to give some of the proceeds of sales to homeless charities rather than making a LOL out of people less fortunate than ourselves” would be a better tagline.
Following on from British Airways’ planespotting ad, it seems like interactive is now quite the thing for advertising and consumer brand engagement.
The pharmacy brand Apotek have fitted out subway adverts in Stockholm with ultra-sonic sensors that react to when a train is arriving or departing the station.
The ads feature a lady with nice hair that swishes about in reaction to the trains.
You know how annoying it is to have to wait in all day for a parcel, only to find a card through your door in the two minutes you popped to the corner shop? Now someone has invented someone who can receive your parcel for you when you’re not even there. Your car.
Volvo are currently trialling a new smart car system that, basically, gives your car keys to a delivery , to enable them to leave your parcel in the boot of your car. Because that doesn’t have disaster written all over it.
The idea uses a smart-phone approved digital key, which allows one-time access to open the boot. Once the boot is closed, the key expires and can only be opened again by the person with the proper key, ie the car owner. The system is based on the functionality of the telematics app Volvo On Call, which, among other things, makes it possible to remotely heat or cool the car and see its position or fuel level via the mobile phone. The system also uses GPS so your car doesn’t even have to be in a stated place at delivery time- the parcel will come to you.
Volvo trialled the technology during a pilot programme of 100 people, 86% of whom agreed that ‘roam delivery’ saved them time.
Volvo are clearly dazzled by the benefits of the scheme, and are aiming to save some of the estimated €1billion re-delivery costs incurred when people aren’t in. We think they haven’t thought everything through. What happens when the delivery person forgets to shut the boot, or leaves raw fish on a sweltering hot day? And this all assumes shady sorts won’t be able to use the system/technology to get into, and off in, your car.
So what do you think?
The branding for the Lancashire borough was drawn up by a local councillor, but was deemed too similar to that of Lovehoney – the sexual happiness people (aka a drop-in centre for all your lube and gag treats).
After spending a whole £3,000 on the project – and wasting no end of councillors valuable time – they insisted that no taxpayer’s money was wasted on it [Not that councils find a myriad of other ways to waste our precious money, eh? - Ed.]
Upon seeing the results, Councillor Ann Kerrigan told her colleagues: “It wouldn’t do much for Pendle and I don’t think we should be associating our logo with this kind of thing.”
They should’ve kept the symbol as both symbols represent a cavalcade of spectacular tools.