10 industry secrets you probably shouldn’t know

May 11th, 2011 12 Comments By Paul Smith

Bitterwallet hole in Southwest Airlines plane 10 industry secrets you probably shouldnt knowWe’re not sure how many of these are genuine and how many are made up, but this thread on Reddit is about professionals revealing a secret about their industry.

Some of them are obvious, others are bloody terrifying. If you’ve got some burning insider secret in your profession, share it with mere mortals in the comments:

Sushi chef – Ahi Tuna is actually just Yellow fin tuna, it’s the lowest quality sushi grade tuna you can get.

Aerospace engineer – Every aircraft you’ve even flown in has hundreds of cracks, dents, and just plain broken parts even if it is brand new. On the plus side we do design for that. A crack can grow to three feet on a 737 between inspections before it becomes a serious problem.

Adult store employee – Many vibrators are pretty much the same item in different packaging – a company will have different “lines” of toys that are really the same toys in different boxes.

Airplane fueler - Jet fuel is not very flammable. It takes a very specific blend of fuel, air, and a spark to light it. You can drop a match in a puddle of jet fuel and it won’t catch fire.

Chef – The best things I cook are for me and my staff. They’re not on the menu.

Dock worker (building skids, handling airline baggage, handling your shipments) - Your “Fragile” stickers are useless. Your “Do Not Stack” stickers are useless. Your “This End Up” stickers, your “High Value Item” stickers, your “do not tilt” stickers, and that lock on your suitcase are all useless. They are there to give you peace of mind.

Chinese airline pilot trainers – I don’t think I’ll ever fly as a passenger on a Chinese airline in my life.

Drycleaner – Your clothes get wet in the cleaning process. The initial cost of your article of clothing has absolutely no bearing on the cost of our services.

Airport manager – Fences are there to keep wildlife out, not al Qaeda. If they want in, they can get in.

Sat nav engineer - I optimise the raw map data for one of the world’s largest producers of personal navigation devices. We use Google Maps to calibrate our data.

Comments (12) Jump to most recent comment
  1. Posted by Lee May 11, 2011 at 4:20 pm

    All sounds pretty standard to me.

  2. Posted by Marky Mark May 11, 2011 at 4:44 pm

    I can confirm the comment about Chinese pilots. And hey! Soon Airbus will be building their planes there too! (Tip: fly Boeing from now on).

    I can believe the use of Google maps too for satnav. The Geographers London A-Z has deliberate errors and ‘phantom’ streets to nab anybody copying them.

  3. Posted by Sawyer May 11, 2011 at 8:26 pm

    Cargo ship officer: Your cheap Tesco bananas are subsided by the Caribbean demand for European cars. Without the return cargo, the shipping costs come very close to exceeding the supermarket sale price. Draw your own conclusions as to how much goes to the grower.

    Cruise ship officer: There *are* enough lifeboats and life rafts for every person on board. However, they’re more of a last resort than most people think. The fishing kit provided in every life raft is not for catching fish – it’s for keeping people occupied, sane, and alive.

    Most insider secrets about my former profession are not so much secrets as they are corrections about misinformed beliefs.

  4. Posted by Boris May 11, 2011 at 8:29 pm

    Drug Tzar: You get 10% of all of the drugs that are impounded at customs to share bweween your friends. Not allowed to sell them though.

  5. Posted by Nick T May 11, 2011 at 8:47 pm

    A pilot once told me that assuming the “brace brace” position may only save your life by accident. Its main purpose is to protect your teeth, because identifying the bodies by dental records is cheaper than by DNA testing.

  6. Posted by Libyan ship owner May 11, 2011 at 9:56 pm

    There *are* enough lifeboats and life rafts for all the people on board. However, I do not consider you to be people.

  7. Posted by me May 12, 2011 at 8:28 am

    Spot on the chefs secret. Unless if they are ENGLISH chefs as they don’t know how to cook anyway…

  8. Posted by someone May 12, 2011 at 9:12 am

    BLOG EDITORS: The fallacy that stories need to be researched and carefully investigated is false. They simply crib stuff out of the daily mail.

  9. Posted by klingelton May 12, 2011 at 9:31 am

    @ Nick T:

    You don’t watch myth busters do you. The brace position does in fact make the crash a little more survivable. the main problem comes from the seat design, where the seat in front of you will break your shins and make escaping the cabin impossible anyway. this is esp true if you’re on a budget flight and tower above the dizzying heights of 3 foot.

    @Bitterwallet: here’s a real study. which airline gives you the smallest amount of leg room vs what’s legal. my bet is first choice.

  10. Posted by Sancghiunathon May 12, 2011 at 1:51 pm

    I can confirm that SatNav softwares rely on what Google maps says. Not because it is better but because when customers complain they always say “look at Google maps”…..and also because most of the time, they got it right.

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  12. Posted by Marcus Potter August 30, 2011 at 6:54 pm

    BBC: Al Qaeda was invented by the CIA and this faked intelligence on the organization’s existence was passed to the FBI to give the military an excuse acceptable by NATO to initiate the war on terror. I don’t work for the BBC, but you can verify this by googling “Al Qaeda doesn’t exist” and viewing wikipedia articles related to 9/11.

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